Chronology

I just woke up dreaming prose so I don't feel guilty about blogging. Perhaps it can be a guilty pleasure, a way of flushing the drainpipes. I'm trying to find the breeze here in my room, tonight, drinking tea at five in the morning - it doesn't seem that cold outside, but I'm trying to feel whatever it is. I'll tell you what's been on my mind, lately - and to the folks older it will definitely sound trite, but it always does. It's being 29, I suppose. I'll always remember 28 as a rough year. I was 27 when I came to grad school, 26 when I left Long Beach; 24, I believe, when I spent a magically rejuvinating summer in NYC; 22 when I left the girlfriend of two and a half years I was living with. Broke up with her on an U-bon train in Berlin. The ride back was not fun, but necessary. Right now I can imagine her reading this (it's actually possible through facebook), and not being so comfortable with me saying that, out loud. But we always did have differences in discretion. It's my story, too, and it's full of weakness - too. I can tell you a lyric that's been rolling through my head by Ryan Adams and the Cardinals, their album Cardinology, their song "Evergreen:" be more like the trees / and less like the clouds, stop / roaming around. . ." Let's just keep letting ourselves in, and out, huh, how 'bout that?